Tuesday, December 28, 2010

It's been a while

So I haven't posted, apparently since August.  I need to start that up again. I have a few things in my life that are constant post worthy issues. Work, Health, Money and Friendship...today most important are work and health.
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I finally got a transfer from that horrible store to a new store. Same business, new atmosphere. And with the exception of it being new and having bugs to work out, I am happy.  I finally feel like I don't have to work with someone that treats their employees like shit.  I don't have to dread coming to work because I know my manager isn't a complete asshole.  Now all I have to worry about is managers fucking up their drawer counts, and making me look like an asshole at the end of day. That is a whole other issue to work on.
 I will say that most of the kids that work here try to work their asses off.  There are a select few that are lazy and as far as I am concerned could be fired or moved elsewhere.  But in all, I am pretty happy with my move. I still want to get away from PB all together, but I might be able to make it work for another year or so.  We'll see.
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I am also going back to school.  Nothing major, I'm working on a Master Teacher Certificate, in ECE with an emphasis on special needs.  Wish me luck, since I'm waitlisted for every class.  But if I get them, I should only need two semester before I am certified.  Then back to grad school.  I will finish that Master's Degree.  I refuse to not complete it.  And after I have completed my school goals, I HOPE this will get me towards my career. Not a job, but my career. Something I love. I want to live to work, not work to live. I am ready for my dream career path. And I refuse to not have it. I will not let myself settle for any less than utter career happiness.
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I have also still procrastinated on the health checkup.  I really am so incredibly nervous to go and get this lump checked out.  I really can't. I know that at the level of sanity (or lack of) that I am at, I will probably sink down to a dark abyss, that will be difficult to come out of, should I find out anything less than happy.
I know I need to get the check up, and have a physical, only to have the nurse tell me, I'm overweight, with high blood pressure, and a lump that probably needs to be drained or worse.  I just know I mentally I can't take it.  I really do try not to show my upset or my nerves. I like to put on a brave face, mostly because I don't want people knowing all my business, or try to find the right words to tell me it will be alright, in the face of death. My mom said I HAVE TO go get a check up after  NYE, and if my insurance doesn't cover it, she will pay for it.  Lord help me and wish me luck, that it is minor.
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At this point those are my main concerns.  Otherwise, I am pretty happy with the way my life is headed. My job may not be ideal for me personally, but I at least have one.  Now it's a matter of finding my career and becoming situated.  I do think once I have the career on track everything else will begin to fall into place. Or at least that is what I hope for.

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