Tuesday, December 28, 2010

It's been a while

So I haven't posted, apparently since August.  I need to start that up again. I have a few things in my life that are constant post worthy issues. Work, Health, Money and Friendship...today most important are work and health.
I finally got a transfer from that horrible store to a new store. Same business, new atmosphere. And with the exception of it being new and having bugs to work out, I am happy.  I finally feel like I don't have to work with someone that treats their employees like shit.  I don't have to dread coming to work because I know my manager isn't a complete asshole.  Now all I have to worry about is managers fucking up their drawer counts, and making me look like an asshole at the end of day. That is a whole other issue to work on.
 I will say that most of the kids that work here try to work their asses off.  There are a select few that are lazy and as far as I am concerned could be fired or moved elsewhere.  But in all, I am pretty happy with my move. I still want to get away from PB all together, but I might be able to make it work for another year or so.  We'll see.
I am also going back to school.  Nothing major, I'm working on a Master Teacher Certificate, in ECE with an emphasis on special needs.  Wish me luck, since I'm waitlisted for every class.  But if I get them, I should only need two semester before I am certified.  Then back to grad school.  I will finish that Master's Degree.  I refuse to not complete it.  And after I have completed my school goals, I HOPE this will get me towards my career. Not a job, but my career. Something I love. I want to live to work, not work to live. I am ready for my dream career path. And I refuse to not have it. I will not let myself settle for any less than utter career happiness.
I have also still procrastinated on the health checkup.  I really am so incredibly nervous to go and get this lump checked out.  I really can't. I know that at the level of sanity (or lack of) that I am at, I will probably sink down to a dark abyss, that will be difficult to come out of, should I find out anything less than happy.
I know I need to get the check up, and have a physical, only to have the nurse tell me, I'm overweight, with high blood pressure, and a lump that probably needs to be drained or worse.  I just know I mentally I can't take it.  I really do try not to show my upset or my nerves. I like to put on a brave face, mostly because I don't want people knowing all my business, or try to find the right words to tell me it will be alright, in the face of death. My mom said I HAVE TO go get a check up after  NYE, and if my insurance doesn't cover it, she will pay for it.  Lord help me and wish me luck, that it is minor.
At this point those are my main concerns.  Otherwise, I am pretty happy with the way my life is headed. My job may not be ideal for me personally, but I at least have one.  Now it's a matter of finding my career and becoming situated.  I do think once I have the career on track everything else will begin to fall into place. Or at least that is what I hope for.

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